The fact that we have smart phones are both a blessing and a curse. They allow us to access every bit of knowledge we could hope to find at the tip of our fingers but it also enables us to send "u up" texts to our exes after a long night of drinking.
But, we can't deny that recieving nonsensical inebriated texts from people provides an endless amount of entertainment. It's like trying to parse out our very own "Da Vinci Code" except it's about a McDonald's order instead of a religious mystery.
1. And here we thought the 4 sections were just a myth.
2. Drunk off cuteness.
3. Never, EVER, under any circumstances, eat the dumpter burrito.
4. I'm going to the FBI and there's nothing you can do about it.
5. That's too many babies.
6. Thanks mom, means a lot to hear that you're happy you didn't go through with that abortion.
7. Well, don't leave yourself hangin'!
8. When you become more Frosted Flakes than human, you must use your powers to drunk text.
9. Ring ring, oyster phone!
10. Jesus Christ not again Jared.
11. He's the E. E. Cummings of the 21 century.
13. Do you think this person has a glowstick or what?
14. No, you're MY specter.