A Lyme At a Time

About 1 week ago, my knees started to hurt. It was nothing new, I'm always in pain and I'm always sick. My roommates have taken to calling my "The Host" (I finally got a nickname!) due to a 10 month cold I developed sophomore year. Everyone had their own theory for my chronic illness; my dad thought it was my weight, my mom thought it was my smoking, and my friends all just assumed I was faking it. But I knew there had to be some more serious, more sympathy-producing reason for my mysterious illnesses.

So my knees hurt and this time I was going to do something about it. Normally when any of my joints started to act up I just assumed it was because I was a fat, lazy bastard. But I haven't gained any weight recently and I decided to go to my school's health center.

Now, I know most of you don't know a thing about Fordham University, but if you did you would know that they are the number one recommenders of Tylenol Cold and Sinus. Why? Because every single person that comes in, no matter what the symptoms, is diagnosed with a sinus infection. I wasn't going to be bullied around anymore and I insisted I get some blood work done.

This morning I got a call from the health center" my tests had come back. I went in to learn that I was HIV Negative (YES!) but very positive for Lyme Disease (SHIT!). But the fun doesn't stop there. The Lyme Disease that is sitting in my body seems to have been sitting there or at least 2 years. "Well," I thought, "that explains a lot" as I wiped the blood from my ears.

Eager to find out what's going to happen to my already overburdened body, I hit WebMD which proceeded to scare the shit out of me. I learned that I can get a cool thing called arthritis or maybe even a little partial paralysis. Neat. Things were going well for me. I called my house to tell them the news and my Dad told me that I "should probably get that taken care of." Ok Dad" I think I will.

I think I will take my dad's advice and go see a real doctor. Hopefully there is some kind of drug they can give me that will make me not sick and not sore. I hope more than anything that there is some new miracle drug that is some kind of mix between Trimspa and Vicadin. Please, keep me in your prayers.

But the cost of drugs for this terrible illness is more than my skinny wallet can handle. I don't have a lot of money and, with my little sister also in college, my parents don't have a lot either. That's why I ask you to give generously to the Streeter Lyme Disease Relief Fund. For just dollars a day, you can help cure a sick humor columnist. Think of the joy on his face when he cashes your check. You'll be bringing a smile to a very sick little boy.

The Streeter Lyme Disease Relief Fund is an independent organization with no ties to big business or even the government. Please, for only $500 a year you can make sure that Streeter still has the ability to write his little column. Please email me and let me know how much you are willing to pledge. I sincerely hope that Streeter and his illness has touched you the way that he has touched so many others, legally.

Seriously, send me money" my electrical bill is huge this month.